Ilang araw nang wala sa sarili si James, bagay na napansin ng mga magulang at kapatid. Isang lingo na ding hindi sya lumalabas ng kwarto nya. Isang gabi, niyaya sya ni Joshua for a drink or two bago uli pumunta ng China si James. Sumama naman ito. But hindi si James na cool ang nakaharap ni Joshua kundi isang quiet, confused at malunkot na James. Ibang iba sya from the James na lighthearted, goodnatured at relaxed.
Kahit alam nyang very private si James sa mga personal na issues nya, hindi napigilan ni Joshua ang sarili, “What’s going on with you?”
Matagal bago umimik si James. “I think Ellis and I are done.”
“What happened,” tanong ni Joshua.
“I was stupid, that’s what went wrong….let’s not talk about it…”
Since hindi naman sya yung tipong nanguusisa nagpasiya syang hayaan na lang muna ang kapatid. Lalabas din ang katotohanan later, he’ll just leave it to Kate. Nang gabing yun, inuwi nya si James na halos hindi na makalakad sa kalasingan.
Umuwi na din sya at nadatnan si Kate na tulog. Nagshower sya saglit dahil alam nyang hate ng misis nya ang amuy ng stale alcohol. “Did you have fun,” antok na tanong ni Kate.
“Not really…James and Ellis are through…”
Nawala ang antok ni Kate at humarap sa asawa. “What?!…I thought they were going okay. Did he tell you why?”
“No he didn’t. You know how he is…he doesn’t like talking about these things….Hey, Kate…”
“Yes,” tanong ng misis nya.
“Thanks for saying yes…,” hinalikan ni Joshua ang kanyang maybahay, saying a silent prayer for her in his life.
–oOo—
“Ellis, lunch tayo,” yaya ni Kate sa kaibigan nya. Nakaupo si Ellis sa may office table nya na tambak ng papel. Pumayat si Ellis, pansin ni Kate, at matamlay ang mga mata.
“I’m a little busy with papers today na hindi ko maiwanan…raincheck na lang…” pag-iiwas ni Ellis. She didn’t like to be surrounded with people who reminded her of James, no matter how great they were.
“No problem, I brought lunch here,” alam ni Kate that Ellis would try to back out of meeting with her. She knew she would pag nasa posisyon din sya ni Ellis. “I got your favourite take-out – plus I have dessert…”
“Talagang kilala mo ko ha…What will I do without you, Kate,” napangiti din sya despite herself. “Saglit ha, ayusin ko lang itong mga papel.”
Sa relief ni Ellis, hindi naman inunkat ni Kate ang nangyari sa kanila ni James. They had lunch at nagkwentuhan sila about Joshua, career ni Kate, the military academy, Anita and John…everything except the obvious – si James. Akala lang nya yun…
“So what happened with James…” biglang tinanong ni Kate.
“I don’t want to talk about it. I CANT talk about it… it’s just too painful to remember…sorry Kate,” sagot ni Ellis.
All of a sudden, nakaramdam si Ellis na paninikip sa sikmura. Tumakbo sya sa lavatory, naduduwal.
–oOo—
“James, open the door,” galit na kumatok sa door nina James si Kate. Pagkabukas ni James ang pintuan, sumugod agad sa loob si Kate at hinarap si James. “I want to know what you did to Ellis. Inano mo sya,” galit ang tonong tinanong ang kuya ng mister nya.
“It’s none of anybody’s business, much less, yours,” galit ding sagot ni James. “Fuck, why wont everybody stay out of my life!”
“Dont give me that crap, James. Answer my question! Anong ginawa mo sa kanya…I just came from her office and she was distraught. I asked her what happened to you, and she wouldn’t tell me. She was crying na hindi pa nya namalayan. This isn’t like her, James. What happened,” ulit ni Kate.
Just like that, humupa ang galit ni James. “I did something stupid, Kate. Her ex-boyfriend showed up where we had dinner. I got jealous, we had an argument and ….. I forced myself on her,” hiyang hiyang inamin ni James. “And I don’t know what to do….kung mapapatawad pa nya ako…”
“Ano!…Are you stupid,” hindi napigilang sagot ni Kate.
“Dont you think I’ve told myself that….I love her, Kate, I do….I dont know how to fix this…What am I going to do now…?”
“Oh, James…What are we going to do now..?” Awang awa din si Kate kay James. She understood how love and insecurity made people do crazy things. But what can she do to help…sasabihin ba nya ang suspicion nya na Ellis could be pregnant? It wasn’t her place to tell him… She just wished she knew how to help these two idiots stop playing games and do something about their powerful feelings for each other…
–oOo–
Kumatok si Ellis sa pintuan. Apprehensive, at galit at the same time. Iniisip nya kung ano ang sasabihin. Isang babae ang sumagot sa pinto, hinanap nya ang amo nito. Pinapasok sya garden para antayin ang amo nya. From where she was standing, she could hear the footsteps of the owner of the house approaching the patio. Ninenerbiyos na humarap si Ellis sa entrance ng garden, hindi alam kung ano ang dapat i-expect.
“Nandito ka pala…I was hoping you would come,” sabi ni Matt. Serioso din ang mukha nya…
-Itutuloy-